Why EVERYTHING You Know About Marketing is WRONG

-- and how the Secret Art of NINJA MARKETING
can Supercharge your Business --

You heard me. EVERYTHING you THOUGHT you knew about marketing is WRONG. Or at least 99% of it is. The fact is that unless you are over 90 years old, virtually all of the so-called marketing you've been exposed to is hocus pocus that has little (or in some cases, nothing) to do with getting people to take out a stack of greenbacks and buy something from you.

And face it. If no one buys anything from you, there's no "bread and bananas" money to feed your kids. It doesn't matter how clever, entertaining-- or even memorable-- your advertising is, it won't put food on the table. Last time I checked, the guy at the checkout counter at the local Safeway isn't impressed by a "Cleo."

"So what IS the NinjaCast?"

First of all, what it ISN'T:

  • It's NOT about stuffy, self-congratulatory "image building" and "branding"
  • It's NOT about boring interviews with smug, "I've got mine, so kiss my feet" industry types
  • It's NOT about ME-- I may throw in a personal example from time to time, but you're NOT going to have to just sit and listen to what I had for breakfast, my favorite color, my secret fantasies and all the other lazy garbage you have to suffer through with other podcasters
  • And it's NOT about me trying to sell you CRAP!

Who knows, at some point I may decide to affiliate with and endorse specific products, etc., but for now, I'm doing this for THREE reasons:

  1. to start a COMMON SENSE REVOLUTION! I'm sick and tired of being treated like a lobotomized, Pavlovian moron or a retarded lab rat!
  2. for the therapeutic value of being able to vent my annoyance and incredulity at the pathetic state of so-called "marketing."
  3. to identify the 1-2 companies (2-3 per year max) that I'm interested in working with at any one time. If after reading this blog and listening to this podcast, you think you might qualify, you can check out the rather sparse info at http://www.shurikensystems.com and/or contact me at: kurt@shurikensystems.com.

Let me repeat the question: "What IS the NinjaCast?"

Everything that the other junk you read and hear is not:

  • FAST- 10-15 minutes max. Bite-size chunks so you can get back the the business of dominating your marketplace!
  • RESULT-ORIENTED- you will get stuff in that 15 minutes that will dramatically improve the way you do your marketing right now.
  • POINTED-- and to the point. I don't have a lot of time to waste and neither do you. Yes, it's brash and perhaps irreverent...and if you don't like it, just SHUT YOUR PIEHOLE and DON'T COME BACK!

OK, in the hope of getting a straight answer, "What will we DO on the NinjaCast?"

Obviously, in a 10-15 minute chunk we can't do everything, but we can do a lot, including:

  • talk about clear and compelling examples of Ninja Marketing concepts
  • laugh at hilarious and pathetic counter examples of "status quo" marketing and advertising
  • Review specific and current ads, trends, marketing campaigns
  • Give real recommendations on books, training and tools of the trade
  • Listen to "Ninja Shopper" calls- you'll actually hear how lame most companies are in how they present themselves to customers
  • Give actual usable samples of headlines, sales letters, copywriting, design tips and templates

So, you interested?

Here's my promise:

IF you pay attention and actually do some of the stuff we'll discuss, the NinjaCast will be, minute for minute, absolutely the most PROFITABLE time you'll spend plugged into your stupid iPod.

If it's not, I'll send you a FREE ebook and/or audio program related to Ninja Marketing. Oh, what the heck, I'll send it to you anyway if you just sign up for my newsletter in the sidebar.

In the future, I'll be offering more freebies, but only if you subscribe to the podcast and/or newsletter. So subscribe NOW.

In the meantime--

Man Your Battle Stations...

Next Time: The 3 Pillars of the Secret Art of Ninja Marketing-- and a reward for proving you actually get it.

Thursday, September 01, 2005

NinjaCast 001- Be the BEST and Blow Your Own Horn

There's no point in marketing your mediocrity.

Being a ninja takes more than just putting on a pair of funny looking black silk pajamas, striking menacing poses and sounding like a poorly-dubbed Hong Kong Kung Fu flick. Before you can convince customers/clients/consumers you are the best, you have to truly be the best.

I'm not going to tell you how to run your company-- I'm just saying that if you're not thoroughly convince that you are vastly superior to your competition, you don't belong in this class. Go home, do some homework, fix what needs fixing, and come back when you've got an inside reality that warrants a supercharged outside perception.

In this podcast, we also described the general format for future programs:
  • MEISATSU (insight or observation)-- introduce a thought or idea, a basic principle of Ninja Marketing.
  • KYOMON (practice or application)-- discuss specific implementations (both good and bad) of these concepts, along with exercises to help you put them into practice right now.
  • BONKURA (stupidity or foolishness)-- have a few laughts at the expense of others... Examine specific "entertaining" examples that dramatically illustrate how clueless most folks are when it comes to effective, ninja marketing techniques.
  • KENSHOU (award or prize)-- introduce and follow up on specific offers, contests and competitions exclusively for NinjaCast listeners/subscribers.
Final Note: To really get the most out of the NinjaCast, you really need to follow both the blog (you're reading it now) as well as the podcast. This blog will not be just "show notes," but will contain additional information, examples, references and other materials from time to time that don't fit the format and/or timeframe of the podcast. Come on, you can digest both of them in less time than it takes to listen to another inane Beavis and Butthead/Wayne's World/"Morning Zoo"/"I just like to hear the sound of my own voice" podcast...

"Man Your Battle Stations..."
NEXT TIME: Who the HECK do you think you ARE, Anyway?! Achieving INSTANT recognition and customer clarity.

Download Podcast NOW